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Instead of catching up on work like I really need to do, I scrubbed the front and back porch and put two coats of teak oil on the glider and chair that live out there.

Hank and I baked together this afternoon I was informed that every dry ingredient I used was dirt. Flour? dirt. Sugar? dirt. Salt? dirt. Baking soda? dirt. Cocoa powder? dirt. Cinnamon? dirt.

I am on the final page of a note pad that I have had sitting around for at least 10 years

sometimes I have to use all of my strength to keep myself from replying to my dad or in-laws texts about an amazing meal out or an adventure they are on with a photo like the diaper trash.

I am still not sure what the rules or etiquette around this is, but I keep seeing photos of newborns wearing clothes in the hospital and wondering if I missed some memo?

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I regularly think about how I did not understand that I was supposed (or even allowed to) put clothes on my freshly born child during the few days we were in the hospital.

30 lbs of peaches and 3lbs of raspberries turned into…13 half pints of spiced peach jam, 6 half pints of whiskey ginger peach jam, 6 half pints peach raspberry jam, 6 half pints raspberry jam, 6 pints peach ice cream topping, along side 8 or so pints of peach butter that’s still in the making.

I talked about it with Henri more when we got home and explained how we use gentle hands with each other and we don't touch other people without their permission. That it's okay to tell someone that you don't like the way that they are touching you. How sometimes it's hard for little kids to remember this and that they are still learning too.

I feel like we've reached a point in parenting where things get a lot bigger very fast.

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Another little kid ran over to Henri and hit them? smacked them bonked them? poked them? Made contact of some kind. Henri was not phased and I didn't see what happened, from where I was it just looked like the kid walked past them. The kids parent apologized and made their child come back to apologize to Henri too. While I appreciate that the parent was aware of the situation and trying to teach better behavior, it was so clear that the little did had no idea what they were saying sorry for.

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My kid is the one at the playground with their head through the equipment yelling “mom kiss???”

Hank just walked over to me eating breakfast, surveyed my plate, grabbed the spoon of peanut butter, shoved it in his mouth, and walked off.

If I ever have another child I want a model with the teeth preinstalled please

I’m hiding under the covers listening to a parenting podcast at full volume while Alex tries to convince an overtired teething screaming Hank to go to sleep for the first time in 13 hours

Last night as we were falling asleep Alex mentioned he just stops thinking when it's time to sleep, which had never crossed my mind as an option or even something that is possible.

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When you're falling asleep do you...

Hank just brought me a blue wooden block that’s shaped like a cloud and told me “cow horse stuck in” and when I asked how we could get the cow horse out they gave me the most offended look and stomped off.

At least after this hurricane everyone will know how to pronounce my child’s name correctly

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